Monday, March 21, 2011

Self Confidence = Successful LIFE style

Build Self Confidence




1.Dress Sharp
Although clothes don’t make the man, they certainly affect the way he feels about himself. No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are. When you don’t look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. Use this to your advantage by taking care of your personal appearance. You dont need to go and spend a lot on clothes, i SURE dont i never really go "fun shopping" believe it or not i actually now HATE the mall, If i need to go get something I make a list as Jenn and I would say "get in, get er DONE, and GET OUT"  One great rule to follow is “spend twice as much, buy half as much”. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. Buying less also helps reduce the clutter in your closet. I try and go thought my closet twice a year and box up what i dont really wear and then the next year i will go through my box and see if i want to wear any of the stuff i put away and if not i take it to the D.I.
2.Walk Faster
One of the easiest ways to tell how a person feels about herself is to look her walk. Is it slow? tired? painful? Or is it energetic and purposeful? People with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go, people to see, and important work to do. Even if you aren’t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by putting some pep in your step. Walking 25% faster will make to you look and feel more important. BUT there is a fine line between looking confident and cocky so walk like how you want people to think of you.

3.Good Posture
The way a person carries herself tells a story. People with slumped shoulders display a lack of self confidence. They aren't enthusiastic about what they’re doing and they don’t consider themselves important. By having good posture, you’ll automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You’ll make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered.

4.Personal Motivation
One of the best ways to build confidence is listening to a motivational speech speaker. Unfortunately, opportunities to listen to a great speaker are few and far between. What has worked for me is every couple of months i write down my strengths, goals, & what i need to do o accomplish them,   whenever I need a confidence boost or I'm feeling down, & I just need a confidence boost. I pull them out .



5.Gratitude
When you focus too much on what you want, the mind creates reasons why you can’t have it. This leads you to dwell on your weaknesses. The best way to avoid this is consciously focusing on gratitude. Set aside time each day to mentally list everything you have to be grateful for. Recall your past successes, loving relationships, and positive attitude . You’ll be amazed how much you have going for you and motivated to take that next step towards success.

6.Compliment other people
When we think negatively about ourselves, we often project that feeling on to others in the form of insults and gossip. To break this cycle of negativity, get in the habit of praising other people. Refuse to engage in backstabbing gossip and make an effort to compliment those around you. In the process, you’ll become well liked. By looking for the best in others,  will bring out the best in you. You have to admit we ALL love to get compliments right? When i see some one down and blue or just shy or some one i can tell this isn't comfortable in the social setting we are in, I try and look for a nice simple complement i can give them, i dont try and be cheesy or make it seem like i'm just trying to make them feel better i find something that i'm honestly genially thinking is cute or cool that they are wearing or how pretty there hair or eyes are.  You would be surprised at the response you get and how much better it makes you FEEL 

7.Sit in the front row

In schools, offices, Church around the world, people constantly try and sit at the back of the room. Most people prefer the back because they’re afraid of being noticed. This reflects a lack of self confidence. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this fear and build your self confidence. You’ll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room. When i went back to school this last fall i was SO scared for my first day of school.. what people were going to think of me, if they were going to like me, hate me, make fun of me. The weekend before i was visiting a good friend in Provo and i was conversing with him about these fears and I remember exactly what he said (and it helps that i wrote it down in my journal to remember) 


"Jenna what you are going to do the first day of school is walk with confidence, tall and strong all the way up to the very front row right in the middle and sit there, open up your books and look straight at the teacher, everyone will know you mean business and you are there to learn."

8.Speak up
During group discussions many people never speak up because they’re afraid that people will judge them for saying something stupid. I use to be one of those people that were afraid. I wouldn't understand a concept in math or wonder why something does what it dose and now lately at school I get curious on random things that the teacher has great knowledge of, people may think they are stupid ?'s  but there is NO SUCH THING as a stupid question, i'm paying GOOD money to get my education and i'm going to try and use EVERY min. of it. I have a goal the every time I'm in Sunday school no matter what we are talking about, if i understand the lesson or if its way over my head I make an effort to speak up at least twice in every group discussion, I helps me with one of my goals, to be a better public speaker  

Side Story: The last time i spoke in public was he END of my Senior year in high school, my Ex boyfriend was visiting his brother and sister-in-law for the weekend and i had been really sick, I had not been able to keep anything down, so i was going to go talk in church and then GO HOME. Well.. long story SHORT i was talking and straight up PASSED OUT!!! I finally came to seeing a couple of faceless heads hovering over me. It didn't hit me for a couple of minuets for me to realize where i was and what had happened!  I was so week my boyfriend had to pretty much carry me out to his car and take me home it was bad.. Note To Self : Having the Flue + Being scared out of your MIND = PASSING OUT... Just Saying
SO.. back to the point..  thats the reason on of my goals is to speak OUT more more confident in my own thoughts, and it helps me recognized I do have a say and part of what people are learning, and if one person learns something new or different from what i say then I have accomplished one of my goals. A couple of times now some one in class will come talk to me after and say thank you for asking a cretin question cause they were wondering the SAME thing but was to scared to ask. makes me feel good.. :)

9.Work out
Along the same lines as personal appearance, physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you’re out of shape, you’ll feel insecure, unattractive, and less energetic. By working out, you improve your physcial appearance, energize yourself, and accomplish something positive. Having the discipline to work out not only makes you feel better, it creates positive momentum that you can build on the rest of the day. I have noticed this ALOT the past few months me and my roommate/best friend/partners in crime/ A.K.A. Cookies & Cream is what most call us.. we have been going straight to the gym after we get off work then when were are done we have so much energy to last us through the rest of the night.. 

10.Focus on contribution
Too often we get caught up in our own desires. We focus too much on ourselves and not enough on the needs of other people. If you stop thinking about yourself and concentrate on the contribution you’re making to the rest of the world, you won’t worry as much about you own flaws. This will increase self confidence. The more you contribute to the world the more you’ll be rewarded with personal success and recognition.

My and my friends had an AMAZING opportunity this weekend to contribute to the "A.R.K" Its a homeless shelter for men in our community. Not just any homeless guy can come live there, he has to be wanting to change, striving to find a job, a future, a LIFE!! It all started when I had gotten home from he gym.. did we did the norm, got a quick bite to eat and sat down for our Netflix session (Jenn got a new HD 55 in. 3D TV with wireless internet)  needless to say we had kinda been home bodies to enjoy the new addition to our house. A couple of days prior i was at the pound seeing the puppies and cats. i LOVE LOVE LOVE dogs so i was playing with them there was a girl there taking them on walks I asked her if she was looking to rescue a dog and she said no she was just there donating her time i thought what a great way to spend my extra time! I'm helping abused dogs, getting them to trust humans again so they can get adopted by a loving family.. it felt so good to help out it was making me feel good about myself and life.. then i got to thinking i should go help the homeless. i contacted a couple of different originations and they all said the same thing hey dont need peoples time they need money, hygiene products, food & clothes. So i was trying to think of a way to raise money and i came up with nothing.. that next night was Friday.. for those of you who dont know my friends and I very well on a Friday/Saturday night with out a doubt you can find us out dancing the night away!! At least once a night there is usually a circle made for the break dancers and hip hoppers to go out and show case there skills. People LOVE it they are eating it all and could watch it all NIGHT long. THEN it hit me! I can have a BREAK DANCE BATTLE.. just like the movies.. that night Jenn and I went home and popped in the movie "step up 3D" I had a good feeling about it and started planning... yeah it was short notice and not very well put together cause i have never planned a B boy battle let alone gone to one in real LIFE!!

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 I put an event on Facebook and people started talking word got around and tonz of guys were wanting to sign up. A bunch of them i had seen out at the club so i knew they were good, but i was sick and didn't go out one Saturday and Jenn came home with a number of a guy to call that killed the dance floor. I called him and had him come over to audition he brought along another friend and they were amazing!! ill see if i can put up a couple of their short videos i took if not you can check out my Facebook videos they are on there.. anyways they were a answer to my prayers!  They could tell i was stressing WAY too much! The sat down and talked me through it and helped me finish the finally details for the night.  They said get all the stuff together and they would MC and i wouldn't have to talk at ALL the whole night.. I was SO down with that idea.. i dont know what I would do with out them !!  i love you guys Boombox & 21!! aka Keith and Walter :) 

The night ran smoothly and we had an AMAZING turn out!! I'm so grateful for my best friend Jenn and her family and her co workers they gave me SO much support lol Jenn had to slap me around a few times when i was freaking out about stupid things that i shouldn't be stressing about. She pretty much kept me sane the whole way through.. WELL we had the battle it was $3 bucks to get in with canned food or hygiene products, OR $5 bucks with out! it was a good environment lots of family and friends!  I was SO SO surprised when 9 of my girlfriends from SCHOOL showed up! We were finishing setting up and I was running around with my head cut off and then those girls come in and when i saw them I was SO happy! it made me calm down and take a deep breath.. I really do have some amazing friends not going to lie.


When ALL was said and DONE we raised over 
$800 BUCKS


Thanks again to ALL my friends, family, & ALL of the sponsors that donated alot of your TIME and MONEY :)


*we are already in the works for next months benefit EVENT so STAY TUNED 


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